I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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