would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
