That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
