Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize