I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a dumb baby whore.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
The feeling are messing with the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I forget how to act sober
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize