which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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