fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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