the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I love you.
Bad choice
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize