So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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