Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
