I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize