i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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