It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize