She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
