So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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