Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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