id be glad to
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Damn victory sex feels great
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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