i think i have herpe
just one?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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