he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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