it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
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I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
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I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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