I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Randomize
