I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize