he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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