she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
