I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
