not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
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