I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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