i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
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