I am in a vortex of obligation.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
