I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
