Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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