You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
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God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
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thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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