Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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