It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
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I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
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And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize