If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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