Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
