Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
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Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
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I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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