I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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