YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
