Please, let me fuck your mom
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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