Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
