The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Dick very happy bro
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
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