He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Randomize
