But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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