chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
