My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
