I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
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So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
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You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.