alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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