i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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