I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
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I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
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Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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