I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Sponge bath it is.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
