We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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