Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
